Houston - we have a problem

Houston from New Orleans writes:

Help me to understand what is going on here. I work in construction and my day starts at 6:30 am. My wife of ten years has discovered twitter and now spends all her time both day and night on the damned computer talking to strangers about stuff that is personal to us. Before that it was Facebook. I have tried to be understanding, but when I get home I am tired and hungry and I get angry when I find her sitting in front of her computer chatting, and laughing along with people, who mean nothing to me, but seem to mean everything to her. I am all but ignored. What the f... is going on here?

Sheepshag:

Hey, man, my condolences. From what you describe, it sounds like your wife has a serious case of the twitavian bird flu which has made her tweet on twitter, and birds of a feather flock together. The United Nations has just declared twitavian flu a global pandemic. It is terminal, dude.
Just messing with you, man, I just made that up. Check it out. There are only three kinds of people in this world. Those who lead the parade, those who march in the parade, and those who stand on the sidelines and watch the parade go by. Sounds like you fit into the last category. If your wife fits into either of the other two, Houston, you may have a problem.
You come home tired and hungry and expect that she is going to drop everything and wait on you... did I get that right?
Dude you can hardly expect someone marching in a parade, much less someone who is leading it to stop and spend time with someone who is content to sit on the sideline and watch the world go by. Get engaged man, or learn to cook.

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